Lemme first says dat I hate skools. I wents once or twice an' it wos horribles. So when Da Webster saids ta me ta fill in for him durin' his sleepy sickness, I checked out dis movie he was lookin' forward ta seein'.

It was greats!  Granted a lot of ye sub-literate stink-apes will fink it dull an' pointless, I suspected da same fing. I watch movies ta be entertained, not ta see slices o' monkey life which I cans check out by stickin' me head outs of da window of Da Websters house or watchin' dere souls bicker argue an' sell each udder outs like da victims o' da libertines in Passolini's Salo. (Hahahahah ye finks I's a doof cos I can'ts write well an' is only eight but I been eights since before "Helviticus committed deuteronomy" as me ol' speccy potato-chuckin' drunk pal Jimmy Joyce said.)

Anyways slice o' life is pish. Frankly dere is nuffin' more horrendous ta me dan havin' ta endure stuff like Mike Leigh or Ken Loach. Well dat's not strictly true havin' ta endure dem stale sickly sweet unrealistic  "Da teacher dat makes da difference ta his (or her) rowdy class" movie. Ye knows Sister Act, Coach Carter, Dangery Minds all dat rubbish. Dey is nuffin' like real skool, ask Eric Harris an' Dylan Klebolds, when ye get down here, ask yer kids ask teahcers ask anyone, or stay oblivious an just reminisce o dem dreamy skive years ye wasted learnin' nuffin much about nuffin' much before poppin' inta da wageslavery o work sleep tears an' deadness.

So as ye can imagine, I was NOT lookin' much forwards ta seein' dis. DEN da fat doof tells me it's in French! wif subtitles no dubbys!  (see earlier comment about ye sub-literate stink apes). So I was not a pleased Audley. I coulda been watchin' "Psycho Cannibals Vs da Crack Ho's from Mars" or " I will Eats yer face" but no here I was goin' ta watch anudder feel good pile o rubbish in a cinema verite style in French wif subtitles. Dat was an a priori minus 37.23 fumbs up right dere.

Still I sat downs an wifin a few minutes I realised dat dis wasn't as bad as I had been leads to assume. First of all ye could tell dat da kids had not been surgically altered by da disneyficator ta be walkin' cartoons, some bein' downright ugly. Secondly dey weren't overactin' how bad dey was, dey was actin' like kids, casually self obssessed, mostly uninterested, starved for attention an' setttin' demselves up wif an us an dem mentality.

BUTS! so was da teachers. From da whinin' o' one of dem sayin' he is sick of da filthy brats to some boot all chuffed cos da spurt she took up her durin' gettin' diddled got fixed an' was developin' inta another monkey mouf through to da mealy moufed liberalism o' da main teacher an' his run ins wif a borderline totalitarian colleague I soon gots drawn inta da tiny story dat was unravellin'. It's not earf shatterin' stuff. Dere is no major crisis for da teach (da protagonist) da deal wif an' come out da udder end. What we get is certainly an' artifice, but it is not a fiction ta make us feel good about sendin' brats ta da industiralised brain laundries o' da state na dis movie shows da futility da promise da apafy an' more dan anyfin' da sheer luck involved in tryin' ta stuff facts inta da brains of shorties dat's brain is already stuffed wif fings EVEN LESS IMPORTANT dan grammar structures an' how ta add an subtract imaginary letters from each udder an stuff.

In dat sense dis movie approaches somefin' dat can be found on da same continent as troof, a bold fing indeed in dis day and age. Dere are no answers here, save da faulty ones yakked out by ta yoofs an' da teachers. We get ta see da frustrations of all involved an' yet my main problem is dat it, as all Skool movies, dere is da basic assumption dat da primary mechanics of skool is unquestionable, dat it is in an' of itself somefin' udder dan a waste of time for da majority. Dat's my problem, dis movie is tryin' ta be objective an' it kinda works.

I has ta say da actin' was top notch (anudder feat in dis day an' age of da wide eyed 2 emotion one gimmick Disneyficated autobots dat infects da medium) da low key approach, da subtle addressin' of da small problems in multi-culturalism which can affect children an' teachers.

Dis ain't a movie wif any answers or much in da way of actin' or splosions or blood, but I haveta give it major kudos for holdin' my attention considerin' everyfin' about it sounds like a "No" ta me and yet it turned out a yes.

A simple, small, well acted, well written movie dat surprised me.

Da Class. Eigh Fumbs up outta ten (dat's includin' da minus for subject matter etc.)